Feb. 28 2010: 2nd Sunday of Lent (C)

A couple of days ago I did a funeral of a mother whose children, grandchildren, and great-grand children were numerous like the stars in the sky, as the Lord told Abram in the First Reading today. It was beautiful to see grandchildren taking active part in the funeral. Some proclaimed the funeral mass readings, some brought gifts during offertory, and some were pall bearers, helping to carry the casket. Seven years ago, her health began to decline, and the family almost lost her then. Her liver failed, and she had to be on life support. Doctors brought her back to life. And the family was surprised that when their mother opened her eyes, she was disappointed and began to fuss. "Why didn't they take me to heaven?" This mother had a near-death experience. She was more than willing to tell her children and grandchildren about her experience.

During the coma when her life hung by a thread, her soul was pulled into a dark tunnel with a faint light at the end of the tunnel. And at the end of the tunnel, she saw a beautiful heavenly realm, and seated in front of her were her deceased family members, friends, and the saints. She tried to speak to them, but they did not reply. Shortly she was pulled back into the tunnel, and when she opened her eyes, she hoped she was in heaven, but alas she was in the hospital room. She was disappointed and fussed. "Why didn't my family pull me into heaven?" Unbeknown to her, she still had a mission on earth, to carry a cross for her family on earth--to suffer for her children, grandchildren, and great-grandchildren. Strangely ever since then, every year around the time of Mardi Gras and Ash Wednesday, she fell seriously ill or fell into coma. It was as if she was going through the passion for a purpose. Incidentally around that part of the year, a grandchild was giving a birth to a great-grandchild. Could she have suffered and carried her cross of suffering for the new birth?

People ask me in the confessional, "Father, I had such a powerful experience of closeness with God several years ago. I felt so close to God then. I don't have that experience any more. How can I get back to that experience?" This is a common experience. By God's sheer gift, they experience a mountaintop closeness with Him. But they must come down from that mountain and face the reality, which may have become tougher to bear since coming down. It's very similar to the experience of Peter, James, and John as they climbed the mountain with Jesus where they experienced Jesus' Transfiguration.

Jesus took them up this mountain to pray, and while Peter, James, and John were asleep, Moses and Elijah appeared and conversed with Jesus. What did they talk about? The gospel says, "they spoke of his exodus that he was going to accomplish in Jerusalem." As Moses led the Israelites out of slavery to Egyptians through the Red Sea, Jesus was going to free humanity from slavery and bondage to sin through the Red Sea which was his Passion, death, and Resurrection. When the disciples woke up, they did not get to hear this portion of the dialogue. When they woke up, they saw the glory of Jesus whose clothing has become dazzling white. And they wanted make this wonderful moment of glory last for a long time. So Peter said, Lord it is good that we are here; let us make three tents for you, Moses, and Elijah. Yet that wasn't how it was going to be. The glory disappeared, and Jesus was again found alone. Yet they were left with one important direction from God the Father Himself, "This is my chosen Son; listen to him."

For those of us who have experienced this glory, this closeness with God, isn't it natural for us to ask that this experience be our every waking moment? Yet Our Lord is telling us in the experience of his Transfiguration, 'In order to reach this glory, I need to undergo suffering, to carry the cross, to be crucified on the cross, and die.' And he has been asking us, "Whoever wants to be my disciple, deny yourself, pick up your cross and follow me." So I tell people who ask me that question in the confessional, "Lord has given you a great grace to let you have the mountaintop experience. Now our Lord is asking you to follow his footsteps, to pick up your cross and follow him, for we have much work to do for our families and for the Lord."

Let's back to the mother who was given a glimpse of heaven in her near-death experience. Why was she given that experience but had to return to earth? She had much work to do for her family and for the Lord. By her suffering, she was joining herself in the very work of Jesus to bring her family back to faith and to help Jesus in conversion of souls. As St. Paul tells us in the Second Reading, "Many conduct themselves as enemies of the cross of Christ. Their end is destruction. Their God is their stomach; their glory is in their 'shame.' Their minds are occupied with earthly things. But our citizenship is in heaven, and from it we also await a savior, the Lord Jesus Christ. He will change our lowly body to conform with his glorified body by the power that enables him also to bring all things into subjection to himself. Therefore, my brothers and sisters, whom I love and long for, my joy and crown, in this way stand firm in the Lord."

Feb 21, 2010: First Sunday of Lent

(Audio of this homily: click here)

The other day I was in the confessional, a lady made a comment as she left: "Father Paul, thank you for being a holy priest." After the lady left, I sat there thinking, "Holy priest? How am I a holy priest? I'm a sinner whom God chose to use as an instrument." Up until two years ago, I spent most of my time in the confessional, on the opposite side of the priest, confessing how weak and frail I was and confessing how many times I have fallen even with tremendous grace of God. I was reminded of this when I was giving a talk at a RCIA retreat this weekend about the Sacrament of Reconciliation. For many preparing to come into Catholic Church from Protestant denominations, their primary question was, "Why should I confess my sins to a priest, a man who is as frail and prone to failure as I? Why can't I confess to Jesus, who did not sin, directly?" My gut answer was, "You're right. Why would you want to confess to another sinner who may be less holier than you?" Would you not want someone who is far advanced in holiness in order to heal you and to forgive you?

When I meditated on the Gospel for today, I wondered if I would have passed the temptations that Satan proposed to Jesus. Would you have passed the temptations? Holy Spirit inspired Jesus to be led into the desert where he fasted for 40 days. First knowing that Jesus was extremely weak from 40 days without food, Satan tempted Jesus in his hunger, "If you are the Son of God, command this stone to become bread." When does Satan tempt us? When we are weak--when we are hungry, tired, or bored. We could be staying up late at night, surfing on the net or flipping through movie channels, and unexpectedly, we come upon images that we should not linger on. When we are tired or bored, we may give in to the temptation. In another situation when we are tired and weak, we may be tempted to lash out in anger or say something hurtful to our loved ones when they demand something of us. What should we do in these situation? Jesus replied to Satan, "Man does not live on bread alone, but on every word that comes from the mouth of God." What does the Word of God say about being tempted to lust? Jesus said, "But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart." Elsewhere he said, "Blessed are the pure of heart, for they shall see God." And what does the Word of God say about being tempted to anger? Jesus said, "But I say to you, whoever is angry with his brother will be liable to judgment." Elsewhere he said, "Blessed are the gentle, for they shall have the earth for their heritage." The Lord is talking about gentleness as strength restrained by love. There is much God's grace that awaits us when we let lust and anger pass over us.

In the next temptation, Satan showed Jesus all the kingdoms of the world and enticed Jesus to accept power and glory. For most of us, Satan tempts us to accept a shortcut to a desired result. For teenagers, it's copying their friend's homework so they can have more free time for play. For adults, one temptation is to achieve something worldly by compromising our relationship with God and His moral law. Those who are smart will fall into the temptation to use it to lord it over and dominate others rather than to serve them. How often this can happen between husbands and wives or between friends or with customers and clients? Yet Jesus rebukes Satan, "You shall worship the Lord, your God, and him alone shall you serve." We are not to be self-serving. Instead Jesus said, "Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they will be filled." (Matt 5:7)

In the last temptation, Satan takes Jesus to the top of the temple and tempts Jesus to test God the Father. Satan wants Jesus to be presumptuous with God. I can remember how presumptuous I was with God after I got "saved" at a non-denominational prayer group in college. The bible classes that I went to after being "saved" taught me that by being saved, all of my past, present, and future sins were forgiven. There was assurance that no matter what I did, I was forgiven. This gave me comfort. But this also led me to presumptions. Does this mean that even if I break the Ten Commandments from now on, I am already forgiven? Did this mean that I would never have to confess those sins to God that I committed after conversion, repent of them, or no need to forgive others who sinned against me? Watching a movie called, "The Miracle of Our Lady of Fatima" cured me of that presumption. After the three children were shown a vision of Hell, Purgatory, and Heaven by Blessed Mother, I grabbed a legal pad and began to write down all my sins of the past which I presumed were forgiven without really even asking God for forgiveness. They were the sins of pride, anger, lust, gluttony, envy, laziness, and greed. And I filled several pages of legal pad. Sometimes folks who come into my confessional remind me of my old self. They say, "Father, it's been 20 years since my last confession. All I can remember is that I forgot to attend some Sunday masses and I could have been more patient with others. That's all." Usually I say to myself, "Ahhh, here before me is Paul Yi from 1996." I then ask them to say "Yes or No" to the Seven Deadly Sins. "Are you sorry for all the times you have been prideful?" I always get "Yes" on all seven questions. On one hand, we cannot put ourselves repeatedly in a near occasion of sin and then expect God to save us from the consequences of the slippery slope into serious sin that results. On the other hand, we cannot presume that we are in such a close and amicable relationship with God when we have offended him so often and not a single "I'm sorry, forgive me" rolls out of our heart.

The beautiful part about being a priest of Jesus Christ is that although I may not be any holier than the person sitting in the pew, God the Father, in his generosity and mercy, chose to give the authority and power to forgive sins to a group of weak and frail men, precisely to show that the power to forgive sins belong exclusively to Him alone. "We do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but we have One Who in every respect has been tested as we are, yet never sinned" (Heb 4:15) Only Jesus alone have been tested, yet never sinned. I on the other hand, have been tested and sinned many times. But I do know how to sympathize with our weaknesses because I have been there and done that and know how challenging yet rewarding it is to be holy, only with God's grace.

Feb 19, 2010: on Fasting - Daily Homily

(excerpts from Catholicism for Dummies)

The tradition of abstaining from meat and fasting on Fridays goes back to the first century, when Christians abstained from eating meat on Fridays to honor Jesus' death on the cross on Good Friday. Because Jesus sacrificed his flesh for the salvation of humankind, the flesh of warm-blooded animals wasn't consumed on Friday.

The practice of abstaining from certain foods and fasting actually goes back to Old Testament times. The Scripture says that God told the Hebrews through Moses how to prepare for celebrating Yom Kippur, the Day of Atonement. Although fasting isn't mentioned, the Scripture does say for this day, "You shall afflict your souls" (Leviticus 16:31; 23:27-32; Numbers 29:7), and from antiquity, rabbis have interpreted this to mean fasting. The New Testament also mentions the practice, saying, "It has been decided by the Holy Spirit...to abstain from meat sacrificed to idols, from blood, from meats of strangled animals." (Acts 15:28-29)

Before Vatican II, Catholics weren't allowed to eat meat on any Friday of the year, and they also had to fast all the weekdays of Lent. But sick people, pregnant or nursing mothers, and those who worked in hard labor jobs, as well as those in the military during wartime, were dispensed. Going back even farther into Catholic history, Catholics weren't allowed to eat meat, eggs, cheese, or dairy products all during Lent. Since Vatican II, however, the obligation is to abstain from meat on Ash Wednesday and every Friday of Lent and to fast on Ash Wednesday and Good Friday.

To get to the heart of why we fast, I'll quote St. Thomas Aquinas:

...fasting is practiced for a threefold purpose. First, in order to control the lusts of the flesh... lust is cooled by abstinence in meat and drink. Secondly, through fasting the mind arises more freely to the contemplation of heavenly things: simply, fasting helps you pray. Thirdly, fasting helps in satisfying for sins. According to St. Augustin, "Fasting cleanses the soul, raises the mind, subjects one's flesh to the spirit, renders the heart contrite and humble, scatters the clouds of concupiscence, quenches the fire of lust, kindles the true light of chastity."

Feb. 16, 2009: Divine Mercy in the Book of Genesis

Several years ago I was asked by a mother to counsel her teenager who was expelled from his Catholic school for possessing drugs. She was distraught and wanted to set her son on a better path than what he's been. I tried to talk to him about God, and this young man replied, "There is too much inconsistencies in the bible for me to believe. Just look at how God is portrayed in the Old Testament versus the New Testament. God of the Old

Testament is a God of wrath, judgment, and punishment, while the God of the New Testament is a God of love." This struggle mirrors what was going on inside him. This young man broke school rules and disobeyed his parents, and for that, he rightly believed in the justice of his action--that the school, the parents, and God have right to punish him. But he's also saying don't start talking to me about how God is merciful or loving, because that's not the kind of God I'm experiencing right now.

For a teenager who is being punished, it is too easy for him to be self-absorbed and resent the school and his parents and to blame others for the wrong he himself is responsible for. The teenager does not see the pain and suffering that he has inflicted on his parents and the whole school community. Likewise, if we look at what Adam and Eve have done wrong only from their perspective, they seem like victims of harsh and severe God who demands complete obedience and perfection. But then, we will miss how much God's heart was pierced by Adam and Eve's act of pride and disobedience. We will miss how God's precious creatures abused their freedom by living a life totally contrary to God's call, and by justice the only answer was the Flood. Yet God's mercy was there when Adam and Eve were given a promise that of the seed of the woman would one day spring forth someone who would crush the evil serpent's head. In His mercy, God already planned for the Messiah, even at the very beginning. Likewise God in his mercy saved the family of Noah in the Ark, giving humanity a second chance. And it was God who heard and saw the affliction under slavery by the Egyptians, and in his mercy, he chose to deliver them.

In the early chapters of Genesis we do not have a very well developed conception of the Divine Mercy. It would be Jesus who will unlock the inner drama that God went through in Genesis, the drama that began by acts of pride and disobedience by His children. How many of our teenagers truly understand their parent's heart when they are grounded and punished? How many of our teenagers know how to say, 'I'm sorry,' and take the full restitution for what they have done? They will begin to understand this punishment as an act of mercy by their parents, when they become parents themselves. For us, the gravity of what God's children did in the Book of Genesis is understood when Jesus reveals the heart of God pierced by disobedience of His children.

Listen to what Our Lord tells St. Faustina:

My daughter, imagine that you are the sovereign of all the world and have the power to dispose of all things according to your good pleasure. You have the power to do all the good you want, and suddenly a little child knocks on your door, all trembling and in tears and, trusting in your kindness, asks for a piece of bread lest he die of starvation. What would you do for this child? Answer Me, my daughter. And I said, "Jesus, I would give the child all it asked and a thousand times more." And the Lord said to me, That is how I am treating your soul. .... Bring your ear close to My Heart, forget everything else, and meditate upon my wondrous mercy. My love will give you the strength and courage you need in these matters.(229)

[My daughter] proclaim that mercy is the greatest attribute of God. All the works of My hands are crowned with mercy. (301)

Feb. 14, 2010: 6th Sunday Ordinary (C)

I had an interesting challenge this week that I want to share with you. If your teenager asked you, "Mom, I don't believe in Jesus. That means I don't have to go to the church, right?" Would you still take him to church? I tried it when I was a teenager, and I always seemed to end up in the car whether I liked it or not. But it's not just for teenagers; people in their 20's, 30's, and 40's ask this question as well. I often ask myself, how could I have answered myself back when I was a teenager when I had that doubt? So that was my challenge this week. How do I explain in a compelling way Jesus to a young person who is doubting? How do I introduce to a young man Jesus who is so real to me? Right before I was heading over to visit this young man, I asked myself, "What should I take with me? Catechism? Bible?" In the end I decided to take a couple of DVDs instead. Young people of this generation are visually oriented and are convinced by what they see on a screen.

At their house we sat down on the couch, and I popped in the DVD. It was a comfortable and beautiful house. A large TV screen began to show a calm morning in the city of Calcutta, India. The streets were already littered with cars and bustling with activity. On the streets some kids were rummaging through a pile of trash, and a man was taking a bath right on the sidewalk with his clothes on. A 2 year old child was squatting on the sidewalk, picking up and putting into his mouth morsels of steamed rice that spilled out of a bag. Already I could see on the face of the teenager that his Western sensitivities were stretched. Our own children seldom rummage through trash or take shower in the public, let alone sleep on the side walk with only a cardboard box as a mattress. The next scene showed two Indian sisters in blue-white striped saris arriving with a metal stretcher. They loaded an elderly man who seemed to be on the verge of dying. He was dangerously thin, showing his rib cage. The sisters loaded him up on a rickety truck turned into an ambulance and brought him to the House of Dying run by the Missionaries of Charity. Inside the building, Mother Teresa was making her morning rounds visiting all the residents, often touching their heads with a big smile. Then as she looked away to another direction, Mother Teresa sighed, "Big suffering." You could see on her face her great desire to alleviate pain and suffering of all the people brought there. I then looked toward the young man sitting on the couch and said, "I wonder how these sisters do it. If our TV allowed us to smell what they smell, especially with the dying, we probably would not be in the same room. I wonder what inspired these sisters to give up so much to do what they are doing now? You and I can simply donate a check to her cause, still sitting comfortably in this sofa. But I wonder if we could give all this up, all the comforts and all our securities, and yet experience the same joy and zeal as Mother Teresa and her sisters." I told him, "They don't get paid for what they are doing. They don't get thank you for what they are doing. They don't have comfortable living quarters when doing their work. So why are they doing this?

The answer lies in the gospel for today, the Beatitudes. "Blessed are you who are poor, for the kingdom of God is yours. Blessed are you who are now hungry, for you will be satisfied. Blessed are you who are now weeping, for you will laugh. Blessed are you when people hate you, and when they exclude and insult you, and denounce your name as evil on account of the Son of Man. Rejoice and leap for joy on that day! Behold, your reward will be great in heaven. But woe to you who have received your consolation. Woe to you who are filled now, for you will be hungry. Woe to you who laugh now, for you will grieve and weep." I notice that at funerals, the deceased can be well dressed lying down in a fancy, expensive casket with beautiful flower arrangements. On the other hand, those who do not have money arrive cremated with barely any flowers. But that's not where I notice the difference. The difference lies on how families and friends grieve over the person's absence. They grieve as if the light that shone brightly is now extinguished. And inevitably as I interview families to find out more about the deceased, I hear the familiar clue that leads to why that person was so loved. I hear things like, "My mom loved Jesus and Blessed Mother. She prayed so much for us. She was always thinking about us, never about herself. She was truly Jesus to us." A family may be financially poor, but rich in love for each other because mom and dad loved Jesus, and they love each other and their children like Jesus does. Another family may be rich financially with all sorts of resources for leisure, yet dirt poor in love because everyone is on their own islands by material distractions and Jesus is considered irrelevant.

As I sat there with that young teenager watching a video on Mother Teresa, I wanted him to know that Jesus was truly a living God whom we can approach so readily. I wanted him to know that those Mother Teresa sisters had true joy and happiness because they loved Jesus. Despite the poverty, harsh living conditions, and suffering they endured, these sisters received one true wealth that death cannot rob of them--Jesus who loved them. I have been a priest for a very short time now, but I have seen the true poverty of Western world that Mother Teresa spoke of; she said often, "There is Calcutta everywhere in the world if we have eyes to see it." I have seen families suffer because a mom or a dad was unfaithful to their wedding vows. I have seen families deeply torn apart because one of their children turned to alcohol or drugs. I have seen elderly parents suffer neglect and loneliness because their children seldom visit them. Yes, there are Calcuttas right here among our parish families, where there are deep poverties of love. Bring Jesus to your Calcuttas, as those Mother Teresa sisters did in India. Bring Jesus to your marriage so poverty of love in your family can once again be filled with joy and happiness.