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This week I was invited to a local elementary school to bless the classrooms. The teacher said that the children were about to take national and state competency exams, and both the kids and teachers were anxious. I arrived at the school about the time when the car pool lines were long and the busses were all lined up to pick up the kids. I sat in the front office, watching the children line up in a single file before the double exit doors leading to the busses. Many children were pointing at me as if I was a novelty. They must not have seen a Catholic priest before, I thought to myself. A couple of First Graders came near me. There was a huge lost and found bin next to me, and a teacher approached them. "What are you trying to find, honey," the teacher asked. "Ummm, a jacket," the kid said. "What does the jacket look like?" The child shrugged his shoulders indicating he didn't know. As the teacher rummaged through the pile of clothes and held each one up for his inspection, she got a blank stare from the child. I thought to myself, 'You won't find it unless you know what you lost.'
A guidance counselor went with me to each classroom and asked the teacher, "Is there anything that you would like Father Paul to pray for especially?" One of the teachers replied, "For many kids, this classroom is the only safe haven they know. This is the most structure they'll experience all day. Many of them go back home to lots of conflict. Some are even neglected. When their parents are not at peace, these kids are not at peace. They can't take these stressful exams when they come from a home without love and without peace." I went around each room sprinkling the Holy Water and prayed, "Heavenly Father, shower down your love and mercy upon all the children of this classroom and their parents. May their moms and dads be filled with Your love so that they may be able to be kind, patient, compassionate, and gentle with each other. May they give that same love to their children. May their homes be filled with Your peace. And please bless the teachers of these children. Fill them with wisdom, prudence, and patience."
These children are not so much lacking in material things. I remember volunteers from St. Vincent de Paul Society telling me about their home visits to folks who request food, utility, or rent assistance. Many of these folks have large screen TV, all the cable channels, and cell phones. What they do lack is love; children do not often get to see kindness, gentleness, patience, compassion, and understanding. The same could be said for middle class and wealthier families as well. They may have all the material needs satisfied, yet in their homes, there is little warmth between mom and dad, little concern for what truly matters the most--love for each other.
The three temptations that Satan presents to Jesus in the desert are the very temptations that all of our families face today--the temptation to replace Heavenly Father's love with things that are worthless and empty before Him--gluttony (when Jesus was tempted to turn a rock into a bread), arrogance (when Jesus was tempted to jump and rely on angels to break his fall), and greed (when Jesus was tempted to seek earthly power). These are all temptations to selfishness. Children soak up like a sponge what their parents say and do. Parents can model for their children what is truly important in life--how to love and serve Heavenly Father and neighbor. Children can also soak up bad vices of their parents. When children witness their parents filling their house with material things, but not love, they soak up the desire to seek material things. How many young people have I encountered whose appetite for things led them to steal because they had the desire but not the money? When children witness their parents fighting, arguing, and cursing in front of them, they will express their anger or stress in the classrooms, not with patience and kindness, but with cursing and outbursts of anger. How can we blame the school or the teachers when our children express what they learned in the home?
Mother Teresa was often asked about advice for families. She said:
People ask me what advice I have for a married couple struggling in their relationship. I always answer "Pray and forgive"; and to young people who come from violent homes, "Pray and forgive"; and to the single mother with no family support, "Pray and forgive." Prayer is needed for children and in families. Love begins at home and that it is why it is important to pray together. If you pray together you will stay together and love each other as God loves each one of you."
During this Lent, I hope we'll take Mother Teresa's advice and make our home a place of prayer and love. Take advantage of evening masses that are offered here at our parish, along with Reconciliation on Wednesday evenings from 6PM to 7:30PM. Reconciling with God through confession will lead to peace with self and with our loved ones.
