Dec. 29, 2013: The Feast of the Holy Family--Jesus, Mary, and Joseph
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Click to hear "Away in a Manger"
At the Christmas Eve mass, we had a Kodak moment during the children’s Christmas program. A live, wiggly baby Jesus was brought from the pew and placed in the arms of a young Mary. Young Joseph knelt there with his hand folded in prayer. The angels walked in to the sanctuary with their fluffy wings as the choir sang beautiful Christmas hymns. Then the baby Jesus began to wiggle. Resourceful young Mary pulled out a binky and put it in Jesus’ mouth. He was calm for five seconds. Then Mary pulled out from her pocket what the Jewish mothers at the time of birth of Jesus would have deployed for fussy babies: a Ziploc full of Cheerios. The next thing Mary should have checked was whether his Huggies needed changing.
What comes to your mind if I ask you if the family you grew up in as a child was a holy family? Am I asking whether your family was peaceful, intact, well adjusted, psychologically balanced, happy, and full of mutual respect? Or am I asking whether your family was free of selfishness, jealousies, deception, competition, yelling, betrayals, and addictions? When you look back, do you ever wish that the family you grew up in was holier? Have you ever wished that your family was spared of tragedies that continue to burden the surviving family members with sadness?
This weekend we celebrate the Holy Family—Jesus, Mary, and Joseph. Why do we call them holy? It’s certainly not due to the circumstances and challenges they faced. Mary was pregnant out of wedlock, and for a time, was viewed as unfaithful by her husband Joseph. In turn, Joseph was not financially resourceful enough to provide a proper place for his wife to give birth. Their holiness was not based on their circumstances. Their holiness was based on their response to their circumstances.
Some families, unfortunately are already separated or divorced. No one wakes up in the morning and says to themselves, "How can I be selfish and difficult for everyone today?" We all are choosing something that seems to us to be good - perhaps good for me and not for you - but my choice is for something I see as good. Spouses are hurt, and children are deeply hurt. The only healing remedy is forgiveness. However, forgiveness is difficult, and genuine forgiveness from the heart takes a long time. And sometimes, this unforgiveness and hurt are passed to the next generation without reconciliation. There continues to be suffering in the world, beginning in our own families.
Jesus was born into this suffering world, sent by His Father to heal the suffering. For this son of God, Joseph and Mary sacrificed much to protect him. Their hearts and minds were prepared through a life of prayer to hear the voice of God. Their holiness was based on their desire to listen, to trust, and to follow the direction God laid out for them.
How about each of us? It’s defeatist thinking to believe that the hurt will never go away and that our families will never reconcile. Granted, we will never achieve complete holiness or peace in our families in this world. But what will it take for us to begin today to listen to God? I want you to remember this acronym before getting impatient, angry, or frustrated with our loved ones or friends: W.A.I.T - Why Am I Talking? If we pause and think about whether what I’m upset over is worth fighting over with my loved one, then we are beginning to trust that God will show us a more loving way. And once we begin obeying the path God shows us, we will be instruments of His Peace.
