Oct. 10, 2009: Funeral for Jeanette Silvio
This past Monday Carolyn, Jeanette's daughter, called me and said that Jeanette was in a hospice. I drove there on Tuesday afternoon. I went into her room, and I saw Carolyn her daughter and Amy her grand daughter who was holding 4 month old Graham whom I baptized a couple of months ago. Immediately tears streamed from both. Jeanette had her eyes closed; her usual vibrant smile wasn't there. Carolyn said, 'Mama, look who is here,' and Jeanette immediately opened her eyes. She said inaudibly, 'I can't talk.' I touched her arm, and it was ice cold. She said, 'Grab my hand and make the Sign of the Cross for me.' I sensed that she knew it was her time to go home. I began the Last Rites, saying the words, 'Blessed Virgin Mary, pray for her...All the angels and saints, pray for her...Go forth Christian soul.' I asked her, "Jeanette, you have been a faithful servant of Jesus here on earth. Will you make sure to pray for this poor priest when you are with Him in Heaven?" She replied, "I certainly will." I knew she worked tirelessly for the Lord here on earth. And I also knew that she will tirelessly work for Him even in Heaven.
Her life was about saying 'yes' to whatever the Lord asked her to do. Over 60 years ago at the young age of 17, she said 'yes' to her groom, Lucas. At her wedding day, the priest asked her the following three questions:
1) "Have you come here freely and without reservation to give yourselves to each other in marriage?"
2) "Will you love and honor each other as man and wife for the rest of your lives?"
3) "Will you accept children lovingly from God and raise them according to the laws of Christ and his Church?"
And she has been faithful to her promises to God from that day onward. She was open to God's gift of children, and so she welcomed Carlin and Carolyn her children, Amy, Todd, Tony, Morgan, and Kelcie her grand children, and Graham her great grand children. She was a mother to her daughter-in-law Karla and son-in-law Mike. And when she made promises, she kept them. So when she made the promise to God to raise them according to the laws of Christ and his Church, she made sure her children personally knew Jesus. Carlin and Carolyn remember their mother asking which mass they went to, what the priest said in the homily, to make sure that they really went to mass. They both said that our First Reading from the book of Proverbs described her perfectly.
"When one finds a worthy wife, her value is far beyond pearls.
Her husband entrusting his heart to her, has an unfailing prize.
She brings him good, and not evil, all the days of her life.
She reaches out her hands to the poor, and extends her arms to the needy.
She opens her mouth in wisdom, and her tongue is kindly counsel.
She watches the conduct of her household, and eats not her food in idleness.
Her children rise up and praise her; her husband too extols her."
She was of pure French descent who married a pure Italian husband. She was so devoted to him that she wanted to learn the way his mother cooked. So she learned how to cook from Lucas' mother. Till this day, her children and grand children refuses to order red gravy spaghetti or brown gravy and rice in restaurants because nothing compares to Jeanette's.
Those of you who are part of the Catholic Daughters know how she was devoted to the cause of Catholic Daughters. She was the regent for two terms, and she coaxed her daughter Carolyn to be active part of the organization as well. She loved serving the poor especially serving meals at Bishop Ott's Shelter and helping St. Vincent de Paul. When I was a seminarian, she had the Catholic Daughters prepared a marvelous care packages for each of us. She has befriended many priests over the years, helping them with fund raising and inviting them over to their house for dinner. She was a great friend to St. Joseph Sisters as well. For the past few years, she has chaired along with Carolyn the Sister's Jubilee event.
On Wednesday afternoon I received a call from her grand daughter Amy that Jeanette has passed. Before I began the prayers with the family, I reminded them that our faith assures us that Jeanette is more present with us than ever. So knowing that she is right here with us, I asked the family to tell Jeanette out loud what they wanted to say. "Mama I love you. Thank you for making me what I am now." "Maw-maw, I love you. I'll miss you." And Morgan her grand daughter said, "Maw-maw thank you for giving my dad." What Morgan said touched me. It spoke of how Jeanette raised her son Carlin so that Carlin could give what he has received from his mom to his daughter Morgan. It spoke of how Jeanette was faithful to what she promised to God 60 years ago at the wedding day, to be open to God's gift of children and to raise them to know and love God.
And so for all these reasons, Jeanette is the woman spoken by the book of Proverbs.
"Many are the women of proven worth, but you, Jeanette, have excelled them all." Charm is deceptive and beauty fleeting; the woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.
So Heavenly Father, give Jeanette "a reward for her labors, and let her works praise her at the city gates."
