(Click left to hear audio of the homily)
This week I was on an airplane for a short visit somewhere. As we took off, I put my foam ear plugs to drown out the loud engine noise. Other folks were putting on their noise canceling ear phones to do the same. As we got to the 10,000 feet, it was somewhat quiet in the cabin when suddenly a baby's cry pierced through. No ear plugs or noise canceling headphone can block that noise. As I sat there, I was thinking how many people on this airplane is wishing that baby to be quiet so that they can get back to their magazines, to their iPods, and to their naps. But I knew that there was one person on that plane responded very differently. One woman in that plane was thinking, "What is it my son? Are you thirsty? Are you hungry? Is the noise bothering you? Come rest your head on my shoulder. It's going to be okay."
On one early morning this week, I celebrated a mass for the Mother Teresa sisters at their convent in St. Agnes. Prominent in their chapel is the large crucifix hanging on the wall. But what's more distinctive about every Missionaries of Charity chapels are that attached right beside the crucifix are two words, "I Thirst." These are the words spoken by Jesus on the cross before he died. Mother Teresa wanted all her sisters to know the significance of those two words of Jesus spoken on the cross. She told the sisters, "How can we last even one day living our life without hearing Jesus say, 'I love you'--impossible. Our soul needs that as much as the body needs to breathe the air. Jesus wants you each to hear Him--speaking in the silence of your heart. Not only He loves you, even more--He longs for you. He thirsts for you. Jesus Himself must be the one to say to you "I Thirst." Hear your own name. Not just once. Every day. If you listen with your heart, you will hear, you will understand"
Prior to becoming a priest, for a long period of time, I have gone to mass thinking it's an obligation. And if I miss it, I kick myself, not because I have missed Jesus, but in my mind I'm obligated to go to confession, which I didn't like. And on some Sundays, I think to myself, 'Well, I didn't go to confession, so I can't receive communion. So what's the point of going to mass this Sunday?' Then next Sunday, I don't show up, and the next, and the next... I wonder what Jesus was thinking when I showed up at mass. Here Jesus was reaching out to me from the cross, "Paul, I thirst for you. I thirst for your love. Why do you not come closer to me. I see you come to mass, but you ignore me. You do not try to talk to me. I only want your love. Please do not be indifferent to me. Do not harden your heart for me."
Jesus did the same for Peter in our gospel today. We remember that Peter denied that he knew Jesus, three times, in order to save himself. Overcome with guilt and shame, Peter did not know what to say when Jesus appeared to him and walked with him on the shores of Galilee. Instead of Peter saying 'I'm sorry,' it was Jesus who first reaches out to Peter. "Peter, do you love me?" And Jesus repeats it, as if he is knocking on the door to the heart of Peter whose heart is hardened by guilt and shame.
I wonder if Jesus finds us, indifferent to his cry for love, just as many of us on that airplane were annoyed by the cry of the baby. I wonder if we ever think that "God just let me go on with my life as I would like it, and in return, I'll attend your mass an hour each week."
Mother Teresa told the following to her sisters, and it really is for all of us. "Jesus' words on the wall of every Missionaries of Charity chapel, they are not from the past only, but alive here and now, spoken to you. Do you believe it? If so, you will hear, you will feel His presence. Let it become as intimate for each of you...He knows your weakness, He wants your love, wants only the chance to love you. Hear Him. Hear your own name."
(All of the quotes of Mother Teresa come from a book called, "Mother Teresa's Secret Fire" written by Fr. Joseph Langford, MC) Click link to Amazon.com
